So last night I was putting Kaya to bed and reading her an alphabet book when we got to the “F” page. I started naming all the ‘F’ words on the page – fox, fence, farmer, when all of a sudden she says:
“Mommy, is ‘fuck’ a bad word?”
Ex-squeeze me??? I didn’t know whether to be more blown away that a 2-year old knew the word ‘fuck’ started with the letter ‘F’ or that my sweet little daughter just dropped an F-bomb on me. I thought a second about how to handle this one.
“Yes, baby, ‘fuck’ is a very bad word and no one should ever say it. It’s an ugly word.”
That seemed to satisfy her – for a minute. The she said:
“So why do you say ‘fuck’, Mommy?”
Oh jeeze. How do I get out of this one? Yes, I have been known from time-to-time, especially in moments of pure frustration and exasperation, to utter the F-word, even in the presence of my children’s innocent ears. For those of you who know me, I am sure none of you are shocked by that revelation right now. I thought back to that afternoon, at Kaya’s ballet recital, when Kaiden refused to get off my lap so I could go snap a picture of Kaya twirling on the stage before her moment was over. I was so mad, before I knew what I was saying I let out: “Fuckin-A!” right into the video camera Siig was using to capture Kaya’s moment for posterity. And now my shining moment of maturity was preserved as well. Wonderful.
Wait a second, I thought, had Kaya heard me all the way from the stage?
No, that was impossible. It must have been some other time I let the word slip. My mouth should be washed out with soap.
“Kaya, if anyone says that word, even Mommy, they have to go in time-out. OK?”
We went back to reading her book. But she was not finished with the conversation:
“Don’t ever say ‘fuck’ again, Mommy.”
Wow, had I just been scolded by my 2-year old?